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For compiling, simply use the --with-mysql[=DIR] configuration option where the optional [DIR] points to the MySQL installation directory.

Although this MySQL extension is compatible with MySQL 4.1.0 and greater, it doesn't support the extra functionality that these versions provide. For that, use the MySQLi extension.

If you would like to install the mysql extension along with the mysqli extension you have to use the same client library to avoid any conflicts.